Reconnecting With An Ex, Negotiating it online and LD.. Options

[Hills]

I've written on a different thread that I'm back in contact with an M I was involved with almost 30 years ago. We haven't had any contact since just after I met the man I married, until now.

Things are going nicely, he emails every few days,he's a little flirty, but he has manners and is polite and has not been making any suggestive comments or anything like that.
We are planning to meet up, but it won't be for several weeks yet - we're LD.

I'd like to know, is an M likely to assume and expect physical intimacy when reuniting with a V he's been involved with previously?

We've exchanged pics etc and it seems that there's still a strong attraction on both sides, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't need to get to know who he is NOW..to me it would be like starting with a brand new rel'ship..I'm guessing that M's dont think that way though..

Does anyone have any experience of this or thoughts about it?
apologies if this isn't clear, I'm tired and feel as if I've not expressed myself terribly well!

[jerseygirl]

I'm not sure what a guy might expect, but I see nothing wrong with clarifying that this is a new slate and not picking up where things left off. I would do this before you're actually in each others' presence, maybe when making the plans to meet. I wouldn't think, even if he was expecting to get right into things again, that he would be put off by this. IMO you don't even know if that chemistry will even be there in person again, so I would mentally treat this as a new M you will be dating.

[Northwestwandere...]

If he's a good guy, which I've got to assume he at least was when you were involved with him in the past, and given that you think it's worth getting to know him again, then I'd say, no, he won't expect to be physical immediately. He might *hope* for it ;-), but a good guy wouldn't expect it IMO.

And even if he does, so what?

[anad]

Hi, Hills...I have had experience with this...

I reunited with an exM a couple of years ago...it had been 20 years since we last saw each other and we had 1500 miles between us...

The physical chemistry was intense with us back in the day, and that same attraction for each other was instant when I got off the plane 20 years later...

Being intimate with him was not the problem for me...the biggest hurdle was that nothing had changed, in fact, the reasons our on again, off again, 4 year relationship didnt work out long ago, were amplified...he was still a cad, just an older one!

This is something you should be clear about before you meet again, if you want to wait, maybe a hotel room would be a good idea? The temptation under the same roof might be too much...

What were the reasons it didn't work the first time around...and what are your expectations this time around?